everything burns

u found a new thing. rest on it, got dependent on it and couldn’t live without it?

on and off. off and on.

A spoonful

Zhiwen’s dad birthday.

when we were still studying, always rot at his home every other day. but  now i think it’s like every two months thing 0.0 with him in the army and me working.

and how much Lele grew. And progressively older, didn’t want to play so much now. And the welcome of Lala, when sh first came, she was like a small rat but now she’s like having some hyperactive disorder.

scratch me happily till i bleed. And his sister who went through alot and i am very glad they grew stronger as a family.

back of ur head is a Voldemort.

me at work and my bimbo colleague asked ehh, why is the picture black and white? becos my surroundings including me ARE black and white.

we is squeeze into lift to send LOVE MEAL to ken’s auntie.

formally announcing our engagement to our close friends.

joanna is the new mistress for my hubs. HHAHAA, ken’s expression is priceless.

another lovely grp nice.

the camera ready huizhi and py’s clappin’ hands make me smile in the train =)

oh dear

We cooked for kenneth well, more of Peiying who really know what she was doing lol.

- Shepherd pie

-chawamushi (with alot of ingredients)

-soba noodles with pork slices

-Tiramisu with lots of expresso which i slept at 3am and looked stone in work lol. no kidding.

he wishes for our early marriage and his next celebration to be a trialmarathon at Hougang stadium. But seriously, he probably wishes for bb creams to matches his skin tone perfectly and for a lasting companion.

=)

And how I could i have forgotten to say that it’s Kenneth’s 20th birthday, the baby of the group.

2010 we are turning 21. God Save Us All.

this is where u ought to be

Yuwen twin ah moh sister and my Naomi who grew fatter and prettier after deciding home is where e heart is.

citrus

Hi rosewood, ur smell lingers on me always. It’s like the smell of an unlit cigarettes, the first sniff “opens” your mind.
And one of my all time favourite smell, the ferrero rocher. The hint of hazelnut and milk and god knows what sends euphoria to me.

Another personal hit is the fragrance of the husky men series. There’s something very masculine abt a deep perfume tone and at the same time, very refreshing. I’m nt talking abt the cheapo ones in Mustafa. And some scents remind you of someone dear. Hopefully not something pungent. =(
I dislike the scent of ‘the sickeningly sweet’, it brings a heavy and irritated feeling imo.

Ok just testing what the bb can do.

Cory

must.get.hair.cut

-from reverse chronological order, little boy blew the harmonica at the train just now. nothing much worth mentioning but it’s been awhile since i heard one.

- had crazy stomach pain, my lunch was OIL. i hate it when i feel unwell at work. but oily stuff makes me happy and gimmes so much energy. How would i live w/o OCK?

- felt pissd today. when people become the customers, a portion of them are motherfuckin’ cheebye. they are so rude/snappish and just unreasonable.

- work at raffles wasn’t so bad afterall. i thought there would be a tense or embarrased atmosphere. well, it goes to say anyone could be a thief. and maybe I was pretty good with her so she aimed B instead.

- i actually shopped at abt 9-10 plus in the morning and it feels really good. afterwhich i had to rush to work but shoppin very early and alone can be satisfying.

-Loaned 3 books but barely got through the quarter of the first one. working like a beaver building the dams.

-really need a good night sleep.

- i miss gifs. like this.

like kena fucked while throwing a tantrum.

2010 & 2009.

still the same lah

Port Of The Sane

omg, it’s bloody gonna be 2am and I am so awake! have to wake up at 8 plus to open shop!

my face is like 0.0 this now.

so im registering at weemart to order daily lens, cheaper than the market price. The name is weemart, reminds me of my weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! but have to wait till i get my pay.

oh ya, get CHIC, it’s a local fashion magazine. i like the fashion adverts. Quite alot of online stuff. and I really want to get a toga jumpsuit from lollyrouge. The model is super chio. and this usually means OOS as well.

And i want to get Lord Of The files (a book)as well, Im not sure whether it’s THAT LOTF whereby it’s a classic. but the storyline is pretty interesting.

It discusses how culture created by man fails, using as an example a group of British schoolboys stuck on a deserted island who try to govern themselves, but with disastrous results. Its stances on the already controversial subjects of human nature and individual welfare versus the common good earned it position 68 on the American Library Association’s list of the one hundred most frequently challenged books of 1990–1999.^[1]

(source: Wikepedia)

im craving for hashbrowns and meat patty from Mac’s big breakfast. =(

im very random. i know.

December passes so fast, today is my husband’s birthday. the baby of the group.

in italics below is r/s, skip this if u tired of stupid r/s probs.

and i don’t know what to do with zw anymore.

it’s like im such a bad guy and i dunno why he wants to stick with me. my colleague says ir’s true love but i reckon it’s true stupidity. Im so gonna get karma.

im afraid it will come in the form of work problems as i had some shit last week and i so totally lost my appeitite.

but the thought of getting back tgt and being so spilt personality and magnifying the little flaws into catastrophes. it’s like we both know me so well, it sucks man. no one can be mentally prepared for this stupidemoshit.

and the solution is to just change. i know i know. but my mind has a mind of its own. it wavers ard and halts to a stop and wavers again.

hen lei.

im just waiting for the day we all can fuck off but at the same time i dun wanna lose him, he is such a great person. it’s so lame to be friends we are not chameleons, we cant end up blending to our situations.

it’s so natural that we would treat each other lovingly at the end of the day.

it’s so hard to give up a companion that has always being there for the past 2 years.

i always think got so burden to just forget abt someone and fucking move on meh? but now it mockingly comes to me and hits me back.

i keep reminding myself i eventually screw up like last time and he says u seems to want to do it again by saying this.

yes, and why do i have such stupid thoughts like this. simply becos it’s no longer like before. everyone is changing and it sucks. to hear that i have nothing to say to u, even though we have so much things to say to each other in life.

wtf. i can no longer comprehend.

tsk

Xmas With Sexys 2009. CHIO!

My scary yet lovely side profile.

me and hu li qun.

the photos are in increasing order.

1,2,3,4,5 people or so.

my beautiful sexys, oozing sexiness and confidence and so much more.

My favourite people in the world. This is my 4th or 5th time consecutively celebrating Xmas Eve with them. so proud of us.

Great thanks to Jacq and Ron for the house loan, and also to Peiying for the great video made. Consisted of a photoslideshow, Johnne’s acting and her composition of a song specially written for us. And lovely Jacq and Yuwen’s sticky sweets and cards. And to all my other sexys, ur presence is priceless.

why does it sound they came to my wedding. mmmmm.

wow. my friends all blew me away.

with all the boyfriends. Guess who is my bf?

im as fair as a geisha. And hq is as hungry as a horse.

And my fave picture for now. The SEXY & BOYFRIEND CLUB CELLGROUP 2010 PICTURE.

lovelovelove.

den i got drunk and slpt and woke up still reeking of alcohol to work. But i still performed okay, hit target. lol

Many more xmas to come.

this makes sense. ALL HAIL REGINA SPEKTOR!!!!

No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re starving or freezing or so very poor

No one laughs at God
When the doctor calls after some routine tests
No one’s laughing at God
When it’s gotten real late
And their kid’s not back from the party yet

No one laughs at God
When their airplane start to uncontrollably shake
No one’s laughing at God
When they see the one they love, hand in hand with someone else
And they hope that they’re mistaken

No one laughs at God
When the cops knock on their door
And they say we got some bad news, sir
No one’s laughing at God
When there’s a famine or fire or flood

But God can be funny
At a cocktail party when listening to a good God-themed joke, or
Or when the crazies say He hates us
And they get so red in the head you think they’re ‘bout to choke
God can be funny,
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious
Ha ha

Lou

Yesterday was like a nasty reenactment of Murphy Law.

I was really so stressed and upset and in the end, I was laughing to myself (not because I gone bonkers) but it wasn’t even related to me. But have to help or else, slits throat

im lazy to repeat the whole incident, but aargh shut up. Brainstorm together and come up with a solution not bloody recapping the whole story, mind you i was there WITH YOU.no need some knn play by play. it’s not some soccer or quidditch match.

anyway it’s a new day so i will not harp on this anymore.

It’s friday and I had a 6 day week. aargh.

just wanna stay at home and rest. don’t wanna be in an air-conditioned area. and hell yeah,have never ever appreciated the great outdoors. all thks to working.

ok debating whether to go tan or sleep. i will probably succumb to the latter. bye

Flaunt & Run

WAH I TELL U I DEVELOPED MUSCLES.

MUSCLES ON MY SCRAWNY ARMS.

ROAR!

HOW ON MOTHERFUCKIN’ EARTH DID I GET THEM?

BY CARRYING DENIM.

WTF.

ANYWAY,

One Republic’s All The Right Moves is like THE SONG.

And Pixie Lott’s Mama Do is really infectious and easy to sing along.

Cut Off Your Hands’s Happy As Can Be ( indie) not so mainstream, ILOVEITTOBITS.

There was this really cuteee boy who asked like 17490 questions, he was uber hyper and active. He hooked a hanger behind his back and almost forgot to give me back. His inquisitvity was endless and when his father dragged him off sheepishly, he was still happily waving to me.

so cute.

then it was boredom. And freezing my ass out. I have never been so relieved in my life for a hot drink and to be outdoors.

i think they are paying me to test my endurance on how long can I last at such a cold and people-less area =/

ANYWAY,

appetite has never been so good in my 20 years of living.

I eat with relish and it makes me genuinely happy. err, sounds like i have a eating disorder previously or maybe the cold has just spur me to eat moree?

my dark eye circles has never looked so unsexy =/

XMAS COMING.

I get my dose of christmas spirit from ahem festive xmas songs from the shopping mall’s toilets. seriously, very festive feel.

Superhuman

Guess where are we? not in some family car lah.

at sushi king

spot me the killer auntie with kfc bags. but still pretty

We were at Jb, run to Tebrau City/Holiday Plaza and City square. dead tired but dirt cheap food and taxi fares. I love my free bra aka as Nude bra. Pls google it u are totally oblivious to slightly newer technology or u are a guy.

it’s like buying a new pair of boobs.

now want to find bareback or low back tops. But i forgot i this month ”hand head will be very tight” ( in chinese). To show my sexyback whereby u can count my vetebrate bones, whatever u call it. Andcome to think of it only Dulan and Zhiwen can appreciate my sexyback.

WAH, SO IMAGINE if Dulan takes the picture of it and I blow it up 47 times and frame it at errrrrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmm, Cityhall Mrt. or maybe less ambitious, my room or amk hub, whereby people can admire the boney beauty.

Admire not encourage boney beauty. Boney Beauties like me get tired easily.

having a miserable 6 day work week next week.

I don’t have a crush anymore. Haha, i actually told him face to face. It’s kinda tiring to take initiatives over and over again. yawn.

Dulan is really cute. He has lovely hair and sharp nose. The longest dick i have ever encountered too.

He may be reading this and go wth.But he has potential. Can go far in life. Or maybe he’s just charming and have a way with words. But this isn’t a time to have crushes on unreadable ppl almost a decade older than me.

me and zw? things are better. but sincerely not getting back. im really lucky he’s still cool with me after that screwup.

aargh. im allegric to my com’s table. I damm scared my leg gt that hq ” 50 cents and 10 cents” evil bitch.

i found Biting Styrofoam. Doesn’t it has a nice ring to it? The serependipity begin just now when I was sipping hot milo at the fitting room and i bite into the styrofoam cup. I love the feeling of hard and soft. And the dents that still store tiny droplets of my milo ( and salivia)

so i think it will be a title for my new notebook.

Ok, everything that is tangible have to be postponed to next month. For now, I have to be Little Miss Miser.

ok lights out!

Incomplete

i think babies are natural chick magnets.

Have you ever notice how they can just draw attention from everyone while their mummies are playing with them or merely just sleeping in their pram? I think guys should just carry a baby in their arms to attract chicks.

it’s funny how i can write all this calmly when all i want to do is to gush out what had happened over the last few days.

Luck would eventually run out while leading a double life.

Today, my friend let me borrow her sixth Harry Potter book after she read it. When I got to the end at two o’ clock in the morning on a school night, I called her, sobbing. All she could make out was “Dumbledore.” She walked to my house in the rain in her pajamas to console me. That’s a true friend. MLIA

LOL, i cried when Dumbledore died but not to this extent sia.

Que Debra Sera

when I was a kid, I just wanted to grow up and be a nurse/teacher/actress. Pardon me, when u were a kid, your pool of professions were only exposed to these. No kid at that time wanted to be a full time blogger/ archaeologist or anywhere near that aspect.

I was in pri 2 or 3, in the much loathed bomb shelter tuition centre in serangoon and I wrote my ambition. The only sentence I can confirmed in the composition was I wanted to be an actress so I can act in different places like the coffeshop/ _____ /_________.

WTF a kid’s mind like me was thinking?

Fast-forward to more than a decade away, I realised that I was an actress.

I was such a natural actress, everyday of my life. It just felt so right to act.

To be seductive/ to be funny/ to be doing something else.

Even winning an Oscar was underestimating my ability. It had always been the part for me. The role of an actress was so meant for me until the day I realised I could not direct and cast yself into various roles.

I had to move on, a newer version should be released.

I began to write on foolscape paper when I was a kid. There was some composition workshop in school, and the lady was an author. She wrote on everyone’s work WOW, good job, YOU ARE A WRITER!

it was to everyone but I was immersely proud as I had very few spelling and grammar errors.

I even wrote an alternate book after Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire. Whereby Dubley had a girlfriend. And there was a mysterious appearance of a girl( supposedly to resemble Emily The Strange) in Ron, Hermione and Harry’s friendship.

and the whole purpose of this entry is to really decipher what I want. Not that actress lah. It’s so in me, I don’t even need it as a job. I’ve stopped writing since awhile back, occasionally feedin this blog with pieces.

The best way was to write manually and instantly. Because ideas and word structures would come out of nowhere. Especially after 12, the best time to get inspired.

And i can’t afford to be complacent now. I want to achieve this, slowly but hopefully steadier. I certainly need more practice and determination.

but anyway what i posted in fb just now.

Life is a vicious cycle. someone u like will never be chasing u but u will always be chasing the one u desire even to no avail.